On to the next adventure...

And like that it was over. After  six months of living in one of the most incredible places on earth (yeah I just said that - but look at the pictures and tell me I'm wrong!) And its all done.  As winter approaches New Zealand's south island, the lodges on the track are closed up and all us staff go our separate ways. As we cleaned rooms and scrubbed dishes for the last time, I couldn't really believe I'd be going away from this place I'd been calling my home. 

On the Milford track I'd been lucky enough to meet and live with a pretty fantastic bunch, that some how just seemed to work.  Whenever a group of people are brought together in an isolated area, its anyones guess how it can work out.  Personalities clash, upsets unfold and before you know it living in a beautiful spot can feel like the worst place in the world. But life on the Milford track had no such dramas.  This I am eternally thankful for as it allowed me to enjoy this amazing environment for all it has.

And what a place.  There is something so soothing about being away from it all; no cars, no phones, no Internet and only time allotted generator power.

Out in Fiordlands bush I felt so safe from the world.  Muggers weren't awaiting around dark pathways - only Kiwis.  Deadly snakes and spiders didn't lurk in the bushes (I'm looking at you Australia!) only tree roots and cheeky Keas.  Obviously its not somewhere I'd want to wander off and get lost, good luck finding your way out of that bush! But away from a human landscape, I felt completely rejuvenated, and yes I know how corny that sounds.  My time on the Milford track has made me absolutely smitten with Fiordland and I really hope we can return.

However, no point crying over sand fly bites and heavy rain fall (the only two drawbacks to Fiordland), its time for another adventure.  After much umming and arhhring me and Zim have contemplated on many options.  We thought about another winter season in Queenstown, running away on to another pirate ship (always the dream) or going up to the North island, as I've been a very bad traveller and not ventured off the south island this whole year.  In the end we came up with another plan, although using the word 'plan' makes me feel like a fraud; its kind of flimsy.

But a plan with have and it is.....Asia!!! At least for a few months we'll be hitting up a few countries in South East Asia.

When this post gets published I would have been in Bali, Indonesia, for a few weeks and our next location is even unknown to ourselves.  One of Zim's friends is getting married on the stunning Island of Nusa Lembongan, so it was the logical place to begin our travels.



So let the experience begin.



Helen

X

The Milford Track

Just a few from the hundreds (perhaps thousands) of photos I've taken whilst living on the track.  On one of our leaves from the lodge (we do go into civilization every now and again before cabin fever set in), me and Zim decided to walk the entire track as a walker.  As well as getting envious of all the people describing areas we couldn't walk to in a day, it was also a great way to experience everything the walkers have to go through before reaching us.

I cannot express how jaw dropping the scenery is on this track, so perhaps I should just show you. It is amazing how much the scenery changes in just one track.

The time I fell apart in Christchurch

Before I reached Christchurch, I thought I had a good understanding of what I'd find.  It may have been three years since the infamous earthquake hit the city, but local news had informed me that this place was still knee deep in rubble, insurance backlog and major construction.

We arrived in the early evening, travelling all day by coach.  After walking (what seemed like miles) to our motel, me and Zim decided to go for a walk around the city centre, or the 'red zone' as it has become known.   It was a beautiful Sunday evening; a sure sign that summer was on its way.  In this once bustling city centre, the scene was the closest to apocalyptic I have ever seen. Some areas were completely cleared, you'd never of suspected a multi-story building, filled with busy offices, once lived.  Other areas were just mounds of rubble, chaperoned by bull dozers and cranes.  Then there were the derelict buildings, with half missing chunks.  Some buildings seemed totally intact, and yet, they were completely abandoned.

As all the construction workers were away from this scene, the place was deserted.  We shared the streets with a few people, just shapes in the distance. This, in the biggest city in the South Island.  Perhaps it was due to the time and day we came to Christchurch and the still weather, but my first impression of Christchurch was eerie.

Over the next few days we went about our business and got things done. I had my breast biopsy and ultrasound, we found a cool 'scaffold' bar to drink in and hung out in the botanical gardens, which I must say, are the most beautiful public gardens I've been to in a long time.  But it’s an incident near a busy road that will stay with me forever...

So being the tourists we are, we went looking for the Cardboard Cathedral.  After the demise of the Cathedral, a pop up one was quickly constructed to help the community in their time of need.  It’s not every day you see a cardboard building, so we went off through the devastated city.
About a block from the Cathedral, we found the memorial. There are many memorials in Christchurch but this one stopped me in my tracks.  On a cleared area stood nearly 200 white chairs; 185 to be exact. It seemed every type of chair possible stood in that area. Stools, rocking chairs, modern style and antique all placed together.

Its when I saw the baby seat that I just lost my shit and begun to cry; in broad daylight, in the middle of the street.  Try as I might, the tears wouldn't stop.
A chair for every person who lost their lives, tailored to their age, personality and lifestyle.

The abandoned red zone was creepy, but this was the real tragedy from the earthquake.
I have seen many memorials throughout the world, whether its for a great battle praising sacrefice and valor, or a dedication to a local legend, but nothing has hit me as hard as this one.  The artist showed such dedication and care for the victims, to show that they were not just a number, that they lived, breathed, felt and loved.

In that moment I felt the unfairness of it all, that this could happen and there was no one to blame.

I would never take away my visit to Christchurch. A wounded city, that has lost so much but felt so very human, with its regeneration, ongoing construction and wish to honor its loved ones

The seals of Kaikoura

Found on the east coast of New Zealand's South Island, the small township of Kaikoura is a pretty special place.  Not only is it a landscape where sea and mountains meet, it also posesses unique access to whales, dolphins and other marine life.  Due to very deep oceans just off the coast, animals such as sperm whales, which are usually found far away from land, come to feed. 

But when I spent a few days in Kaikoura, I didn't go and swim with Dolphins or spot giant mammals from a boat. I took pictures of Seals. A lot of pictures.

I just think seals are awesome.  In the water, lazing in the sun, from pup to bull, it doesn't matter.

I think they are so cool I even payed to swim with them.  Taken out on a boat to where the inquisitive adolescents live, I spent hours watching, dancing and playing with these amazing creatures.  There is also nothing so cute as over twenty seal pups playing under a waterfall.

I think they are by far my favourite New Zealand Mammal.

The lump in my breast

I’ve been contemplating this post for a while.  Half a dozen times I’ve started writing about the lump in my breast and then drawn a blank. So please bear with me if my writing is a little disjointed and much personal than normal. But I want to be honest, which isn’t always the most beautiful word out there.

It was just a slight touch, a quick sweep of my hand across my breast plate.  That is how I found my lump; in the kitchen, cooking up dinner for Me and Zim.  By the time he got home from work I was already a nervous wreck.  'It’s probably nothing' he told me, but I didn't sleep all night.

The next day I went to the Doctors. 'It’s probably nothing but you'll need to run some tests in Christchurch' they said. It would be over a week until I'd be leaving Queenstown and heading up north.    That’s when my imagination really went into overdrive.  You see, my brain has this coping mechanism, where it goes through all the bad scenarios I can think of. That way, perhaps I'll be a bit more prepared; maybe the worst news won't be such a blow.

Visions of Cancer were everywhere. Coincidently, 'breast cancer awareness month' had just started. Pink ribbons were being sold on every street, Cancer was discussed on every TV channel and I was even confronted by a giant pink bra in Wanaka. On a couple of occasions, I did internet searches on breast cancer treatment, survival rates and even wig options.Yeah. I did that.

 All the time I kept asking myself the same question: What if its cancer?

Of all the things that entered my head, one answer panicked me the most.  If I was sick, I'd have to go back to England - very quickly.  It wasn’t the idea of the U.K, with its kick ass sense of humor and endless cups of tea that frightened me. I love England – it’s the country that raised me, where the majority of my family live and has un-confusing clothes sizes.  It was because it’s a country where Zim, my partner, wouldn’t be able to go with me, at least straight away.  In England he would be the foreigner and have no legal right to work.  The idea of going through something terrible was bad enough, but to loss him too was just too much.  Later, in the middle of sleepless nights the really wild and crazy thoughts seeped in. I thought of painful chemo, losing my hair, becoming infertile and dying before my time.  I prayed to a higher power out of sheer desperation.  For the first time in years, I was petrified.  This wasn’t supposed to happen to me. Cancer happened to other people; Friends of friends and the aged.

It was this event that was the catalyst for my lack of blogging.  All my excitement and enthusiasm for our impeding trip across the south island and our adventure to the wilderness went out the window.  How could I talk about plans that might not happen?  I could only thing about my lump and couldn’t really say much until the biopsy was back.  It was only after we left Queenstown that I began to relax and find some peace.  Even with the giant bra attack in Wanaka, the change of scenery helped me unwind.

When we reached Christchurch, the apocalyptic setting of rubble and damage did little to calm my nerves, but getting the ultrasound and biopsy out the way did. I realized I was doing everything right and whatever the results said I could make it work.

Just before my job in Fiordland was set to begin, the results were in. The lump was benign - the most beautiful word is the world.  No cancerous cells were detected. I was free to stay in New Zealand.

In turned out my breast lump was not a story of cancer. It was one of over-reaction and wild speculation.  I learnt that breast lumps aren’t always Cancer, they are just there, which by the way media NO ONE HAS EVER TOLD ME. Do an awareness week about that some time.  With the news I felt shame. A dear friend just lost a parent to cancer and here I was, just getting my knickers in a twist over the idea of the disease. 

On the whole, however, I felt so thankful to the universe; for my freedom and the ability to stay on my chosen path. I’m was thankful for having a loving family, that even though I was thousands of miles away, gave me so much support.   And I knew, from my over the top worrying, that what I’m doing right now is what I want.  I’m not drifting aimlessly; I’m experiencing and exploring this planet in my own sweet time.

It’s not hard to see that my anguish awaiting the test results was pretty much self-inflicted, but the whole ordeal has, in some ways, changed me. I’ve spent the last six months putting those changes to the test.  I don't want to just exist, I want to live. I want to take part in the world around me and do the things I always said I would.  I want to look after my body, treat it with the respect it deserves.  But most importantly, I want to fill my life and those around me with happiness and love.

So here's to following happiness, with my lumpy boob in tow.

Helen x

Image from here

Where I've been whilst my blog slept

Ah old friend, its really been too long.  And all this time I've missed you, really I have.  This blog is just a drop in an ocean of electronic information, a feeble little thing chronically this human's life.  But I've missed our catch-ups, at having a space just for me.

For five months I haven't been around. For the most part this is due to my move to New Zealand's wilderness, where Internet is not an option. And its been fantastic, completely switching off and doing all those things I've been putting off like reading books again and running (yep I run now, believe me no one is as shocked as myself).

If I'd really tried I know I could have kept updates going. I could of scheduled posts while I was away for six weeks and then spent my leave weeks scrambling about putting it all together.  But I didn't want to. What I wanted was to engross myself in my surroundings and if I'm honest, get my passion back. Well I found it.

This is Fiordland -  my beautiful home for the past few months.

In my lifetime, I've experienced some amazing sights, but nothing could prepare me for the natural splendour that is Fiordland national park.  

With two more months left of my seasonal work, this blog will remain on the quiet side for a little longer, but I will return.  Bush life has got me feeling a lot more creative and there are some exciting times a head.

See you in a little while,

Helen x

11 days away...

All has been rather quiet on the blog front as we took a brief holiday to Kaikoura. Stopping in Wanaka and Christchurch on the way, I've been enjoying the life of a holiday maker.  Going fishing, long bus journeys, eating seafood and swimming with wild seals (my new favourite animal) has been my life these past eleven days.  Lots to tell but for now I'll leave you with this lazy seal and Kaikoura's amazing mountain range.

 My silence has also been a little longer than planned after my laptop decided to break.  The WiFi doesn't work anymore so I'm back to internet cafes and less frequent posts.

Now we're back in Queenstown for a few days, preparing all the bits and bobs before we head to the Milford track to start work.  I'm currently trying to shift my brain out of holiday mode and into working, but still my head is filled with seal pups and overland travel. Wish me luck!!!!

The End of my Ski Season

Yesterday I worked my last shift up at Coronet Ski Field. Unfortunately, as I want to work the whole summer season on the Milford track, I must finish at the ski field a little early. Two weeks prior to the scheduled close. This is to do with my working holiday visa requirements, which I might bore you with one day.  And so, its farewell to a routine and lifestyle I've got used to.

For me, working a ski season has been a positive and eye opening experience.

Growing up in southern England, where you only get snow about twice a year,  local ski fields weren't setting up shop but hey, maybe in the next ice age.  Ski trips to Europe weren't exactly economically viable. I'm not dissing this, it was my parent's decision to have more than two children and as the youngest of four, my existence depended on this.  Bad luck older siblings, you could have been spending the spring holidays making tracks in the Alps, instead you got rainy days playing cards in Bued. Ha! Don't feel too sorry for them readers,  they once ganged up and mugged me but more on my repressed memories later. The point I’m trying to make is that growing up, I was never exposed to this sub culture and never thought it was something I'd come across.  But on hearing the stories and adventures of friends, working a ski season has been on my list of goals.

I came to Queenstown for this purpose and if my application for a ski field was unsuccessful, I'd just work in town and buy a lift pass.  From when I put in my job application in to when I got a call for an interview was a space of three months. I was so nervous about the interview, I knew how much I wanted this job.

Being part of the ski season, not only was it a great incentive to learn to snowboard (more on this later), it allowed me to work in a fantastic environment.  I will never go as far as saying I was happy to wake up in the morning and go to work.  I'm not a morning person and I'm never happy when the alarm goes off.  But as soon as I got on the bus to the mountain everything was good.  I enjoyed  the view as the sun transformed the landscape.  I enjoyed being surrounded by enthusiastic, cheerful people and a department I really loved.

Throughout my work and travel, I've experienced a lot of  employers, all with their own ideas on how to treat their workers and what they expect from them.  Coronet Peak has been one of the best.

Sometimes I don't think you know how you feel about a place until you leave.  On my last day, I wasn't itching to go but felt sad and reluctant to say any goodbyes.

What's the saying again? 'when one door closes another opens.'  By definition season work must end, but change is not always bad.

Thank you Coronet Peak and its staff for giving me a pretty amazing experience.